Listening

Over the years I have tried to develop a very important skill.... the ability to listen. This is a skill that needs to be worked upon and does not just come naturally. Most people can "hear" very well but may not actually "listen" to things as they are being said. My wife, who I love dearly, is a prime example.

On many occasions I say things to my wife, which I believe may be of interest, or at least might provide some information.  What I have found is that in most cases my wife's mind is in a completely different place at the time and while it appears that she heard what I said, she wasn't really listening. She was either formulating a response in advance or she starts talking to me about something completely off the topic. Sometimes she will acknowledge haring what I said but later she will bring to my attention the same thing I had told her earlier.

Listening is great. It allows you to learn, get information, and then reflect upon what has been said. Because people tend to want to be right, they spend most of their time developing their thoughts to say what they want, or develop a rebuttal they don't receive the message that someone else is sending to them. I found in the business world this can be very detrimental. I once supervised a key account representative, whose major flaw was that he didn't listen to his customers. He was constantly interrupting them to state "his" position. He never listened close enough to find out what the real objections to his presentations were.

I think part of our national problem, particularly in government, is the inability to listen. Everyone is pushing their agenda or they are bent of opposing the opposition that actual listening cannot occur. I have learned that wisdom comes from knowing that you do not know everything, and that there is always someone that can do something better than you.